my sim setting herself on fire the second I leave the room to grab a snack

Sims

me packing for an 8 hour road trip knowing my check engine light is on and won't be doing anything about it

Travel

sitting back to admire my work (deleting the fences in tycoon and watching the dinosaurs eat everyone)

Zoo Tycon

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me after screenshotting something I will definitely never look at again

Screenshot

RE CAN every vanlife youtuber trying to convince us they love sh*tting 2 feet from their pillow

Camping

No Worries!

Sleepy Eepy

my personal 2 am dr*nken ubereats budget charges

Uber

a grown peacefully person about to go on a 3- scrolling minute rant about why a through my celebrity relationship is bad for their fyp personal mental health

Social Media

me existing invasive thoughts about the debt ceiling crisis

Debt

putting on a cute outfit and a man about to loudly taking a proposition me on the street in broad leisurely stroll daylight to my destination

Cat Calling

everyone with a personality someone and a life about to bring up their work and career laughing and having a good time

Sunday Scaries

every single little scrap of news even tangentially related to greta gerwig's barbie

Greta Gerwig

we need fewer people with podcasts and more people with grips on reality

Podcasts

AMERICAN 86 I just need four shots of espresso to wake up and do my job and four shots of liquor to undo the anxious knot in my stomach I got from waking up and doing my job

Espresso

therapy isn't enough I need to end an angry phone call by flipping one of these bad boys shut mid-sentence ACAD AM ERIC DANCE 111 Chicago Ave. Chicago, IL 60611 4 7 2 Bye 5 3 9 6

Flip Phone

2023 NCAA DIVISION / MEN'S BASKETBALL CHAMPIONSHIP - - - - - FIRST NEW FINAL FOUR SOUTH NC NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP - OCBS EAST MARU - me filling out my bracket based on who has the cutest colors

NCAA

me holding up the fancy soda machine line while I mix 17 flavors together in my cup POWER HIC FUZE POWER If Coke water choose your Coca-Cola

Fountain Soda

on hour 6 of sitting on the bed in my towel after a shower and I think i've solved the climate crisis

Towel

leave me alone I'm recharging E29 Travel 99 ? LOVA TIVE CLOROX

Target

I want to be an effervescent social butterfly with dazzling wit and classic beauty for you right now but there's so much tv I haven't watched yet PIZZA POPCORN MOVIES

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me making potions in the bathroom sink while my parents argue downstairs about the economy Dove L'ORFAL Kids STRAWBERRY SHAMPOO BERRY - - -

Mixing Potions

coming down for breakfast after giving each other haircuts at the sleepover

Haircuts

we need an american girl doll who files a class action lawsuit against nintendo for the wii fit giving us all body dysmorphia in the 5th grade

Wii Fit

me having a beach meltdown because my parents got me flip flops and the feeling of plastic between my toes was sending me into a rage I was unaware you could experience

Shoreline

feeling unstoppable after meticulously sticking all my loose hair strands to the shower wall

Hot Girl Shower

we need an american girl doll who chewed on her polly pocket clothes me D

Polly Pocket

THE VAULT we need an american girl doll who sees the coca-cola recipe in the coke vault and gets executed

Coca Cola

Hailey Beiber

we need an american girl doll who washes her thongs in the sink so her mom won't find them

Just Girl Things

we need an american girl doll who eats cheese out of the bag with her hand

Cheese Bag

we need an american girl doll who was enraged at paul revere for waking everyone up during the midnight run

Paul Revere

THE we need an american girl doll who was nominated for the ALS ice bucket challenge in 2014 and still hasn't done it